Xiaohongshu
This LGBTQ+ History Month, Danilo, your Disabled Students’ Officer, LGBTQ+ Social Secretary and former LGBTQ+ Officer, talks to us about something that isn’t discussed enough: loneliness. They shared their personal experiences, as well as what meaningful support really looks like in a community.
Happy LGBTQ+ History Month everyone! I hope you are enjoying it as much as possible and I hope you take this opportunity to do something that makes you very happy (as you should be doing every day!).
LGBTQ+ History Month is always important, but in our current climate, with politicians across the world trying to scale back our rights and the increase of transphobic discourse in the UK, it is even more essential now. LGBTQ+ issues are something that we should always be working hard to address every single day, not just in February.
When I helped organise LGBTQ+ History Month in 2025, I had the theme of "Past, Present and Future" in mind – essentially, to ensure that the past is being celebrated and remembered, that students and staff are enjoying activities in the present and that we are all working together to create a better future for LGBTQ+ people everywhere.
How loneliness can show up
One of the issues I want to talk about is a topic that isn’t always discussed enough: Loneliness. Loneliness is a big issue in the LGBTQ+ community. LGBTQ+ people are more likely to face loneliness due to there being less LGBTQ+ people in comparison to the cis-het population, as well as fears of discrimination. LGBTQ+ young people are twice as likely to feel lonely compared to those not part of the LGBTQ+ Community, and over half of LGBTQ+ young people feel isolated every single day. This is really concerning and devastating, and unfortunately, I personally relate to it – as do many other LGBTQ+ young people.
During secondary school (*shudders*), I had very few friends and was bullied - I felt so lonely all of the time, and I hated myself every day. I came out as gay in year 10 but really struggled and the loneliness got to me so badly that I struggled with my mental health severely.
I was very lucky to make friends in sixth form, but when I started UCL in 2020 (possibly one of the worst years to start!), I really struggled to meet people and felt so lonely again, and this really impacted my mental health a lot. To this day, my anxiety is still bad partially due to how I felt at that time.
The only good thing about these experiences is that it made me realise that my ultimate goal in life is to help end (or at least massively reduce) loneliness. My dream is to one day run my own LGBTQ+ Community Centre, and it is partially why I run so many societies/networks at UCL, as I want to help increase the chances of students being able to find a group that they enjoy and make new friends.
Championing inclusivity and creating welcoming environments
When I became Social Secretary of the UCL LGBTQ+ Network a few years back, I really wanted to ensure that the network was a very welcoming and enjoyable place where UCL queer students could meet each other and make friends.
I try to run a minimum of three different events each week, at different times and on different days, to ensure that there are always multiple opportunities for members to get involved and meet others.
It’s important to me that all events are inclusive, welcoming and fun. I believe it’s really important for students who are busy, or those who are only comfortable in smaller or quieter environments, to be included, and the events I run try to reflect and support this. We only have this one life to live and enjoy to the maximum, which is why helping and looking out for others should be championed as much as possible.
Getting involved in the LGBTQ+ Network
If you are a member of the LGBTQ+ community and are feeling lonely, please know that things can and will get better. Joining the UCL LGBTQ+ Network is a good place to start, and please do not hesitate to contact me if there is anything I can do to help with this – whether it is an activity you would like to be run or if there are any access arrangements, or even if you want to come to the event a bit earlier or want me to pair you in a buddy system.
There are also other LGBTQ+ groups in UCL, such as Drag Society and the LGBTQPOC Community, as well as over 400 other clubs, societies, networks and volunteering projects where you can meet others and find your community.
Places to find community in London
There are also many different LGBTQ+ groups in London where you can meet others. London Friend (situated in Caledonian Road) has several dedicated groups - including groups for older LGBTQ+ people, a creative writing group, a group for sapphic women, women's craft and social, groups for men, groups for trans and non-binary folk and a group for LGBTQ+ neurodivergent people.
There is also the London LGBTQ+ Community Centre, near the Tate Modern, which has several events almost every day (including Christmas) ranging from board game socials and language meetups to dancing lessons and yoga!
You can also check out LGBTIQ+ centre, which has groups and events such as Creative Cafe Drop In, Open Out haircuts, African Rainbow Family and many more. Rainbow Mind, an LGBTQ+ Mental Health Charity that I volunteer at, has several groups where LGBTQ+ young adults can connect (including - no pun intended - QueerConnect). And beyond these examples, there are various LGBTQ+ clubs, apps, activities, nightclubs, cafes and organisations in and outside of London where you can meet others.
The importance of community
The message that I’d really like to share with you is that as hard as it is experiencing loneliness – things can and will get better.
There are so many things we can do to help - whether it is volunteering, sharing LGBTQ+ community groups and even just checking in on one another. These may feel small, but you never know how one action could change someone’s life. The power you have is huge. It is so essential to put the "Community" in the LGBTQ+ Community.
You can contact Danilo at: [email protected]