Kemi talked us through her inspiring journey as a female mentor with Laamiga, a charity run by women for Minority Ethnic and migrant women. Having graduated from UCL in 2021, she continues to volunteer with the organisation to bring a real change to her mentees.
Tell us a little about your volunteering
Laamiga is a UK-based organisation that delivers projects aimed at providing tools to help women of colour boost their confidence through mentoring and training. I joined the organisation last May to contribute in any way to making women realise their potential.
How did you find out about the role?
Through the Volunteering directory. The tagline for the organisation page really stood out to me because it was all about giving women the confidence they need to step up and own their life.
Why did you want to become a volunteer?
I was particularly drawn to this role since it revolved around helping women and, this is something I am passionate about.
Once I started, I was able to connect with my mentee, and listening to her story inspired me. Every session is a learning process and, seeing her build her resilience up bit by bit brought me great satisfaction. You can tell I genuinely enjoyed my time as a volunteer since I am still with the organisation even after graduating.
People would assume that a mentor would prepare topics and steer the discussion- but it was completely different for me. My mentee was encouraged to lead the conversation, which created a more dynamic space. We try to make the mentees accountable for their own growth so they find their purpose and actively work towards it. It’s all about what they want and where I can fit in. It was not a one-sided conversation where it was just my mentee- we both shared our experiences and stories.
What difference do you feel you’ve made by volunteering?
Through the 1-hour session we held each week, my mentee would set goals, and I would support her in every way I could. This included helping her prep for job interviews. Everyone knows the feeling of a daunting interview, but these sessions really added value and boosted her confidence.
Every time it feels like we hit a bumpy road, I remind her of the amazing things she has achieved to date that acts as a testament to all the great things she is capable of.
My mentee did not have a very good relationship with her family due to personal reasons. Surprisingly, our sessions helped mend that slightly. She says she reaches out to her family and interacts with them a lot more now, which made me so ecstatic! She started focusing more on her interests and things she likes doing more. I can tell she is a lot more confident with job applications too.
I guess I only realised I had made a difference when I went on break. My mentee wanted me to resume the sessions as soon as I could! She felt safe when we were in our little space chatting and benefitted from the sessions. Hearing this made me feel so motivated to carry on!
What impact has volunteering had on you?
The ability to question and inspire others. It is always important to ask really open-ended questions because you want to help them express their thoughts freely and let them know you are listening. It is also hard not to step in and help them with every little task. But I had to learn not to try doing the work for her since she needed to learn how to do it independently (which I knew she was capable of!).
I never felt that I was in the role on my own as a mentor. The team worked hard to build strong communication channels and bring all the mentors close through mentoring hubs and meetings. We even have a WhatsApp group where we can discuss ideas or even ask for advice regarding specific mentee queries. We also received mentorship training at the start of the role.
What’s the best thing about volunteering?
The focal point of volunteering is the service itself. It lets you focus on something other than yourself. There are dual benefits- you give back to the community, and you are given the opportunity to grow. And let me tell you something- volunteering is the secret to building your confidence! Honestly, the benefits are immense. Even though the conversations I have are about my mentee, I gain ideas for myself.
I feel like we don’t have a lot of female mentors, but we have a lot of young women with great potential who just need a bit of a push. Laamiga creates an avenue to try and bridge this gap.
And the most challenging? How did you overcome the challenges?
The emotional side of the role. When you connect to your mentee, and she faces a challenge, you can almost feel the pain like it is your own.
My mentee’s story broke me, but I couldn’t show it since I needed to be the rock she could hold onto during sessions. The thing about these young women is that they have so much to offer but have challenges that hinder them. So instead of channelling their energy to realise their dream, they have to focus on fighting their battles and overcoming them. Hearing this makes it hard not to be overwhelmed. I had to make her feel safe, and it was essential not to let my emotions lead the conversation.
One bitter fact I learned was that there is a limit to what I could do, especially when you hear the hurdles your mentee faces or pushes through. However, what I could do was give her hope- realistic hope. If she had the strength to sign up and have these difficult conversations, she is already halfway there mentally.
Tell us about something memorable that’s happened to you whilst volunteering
I remember that she needed to see a specialist regarding some health concerns. But, unfortunately, they kept cancelling because of Covid-19. This was hard for her since she needed a diagnosis to see if she could continue working.
She kept me in the loop of the situation, and I felt disheartened since there wasn’t much I could do to resolve this for her. But she has a fighter spirit. Instead of feeling disappointed, she started looking for alternatives on her own and managed to sort it out independently. As a mentor, these small steps make you feel overjoyed. She could have very easily lost hope, but she persevered. This was a lesson to me as well- you just can’t afford to get disappointed. Instead, get up and get working on fixing your problems!
Would you recommend volunteering? If so, why?
Yes! For all the reasons I have shared. In trying to make an impact, you are impacted as well!
It is a quick way to identify what you want to do in life too. Find your passion and use volunteering to grow on it. You can also pick up a lot of people and tech skills. It connects you to a community of likeminded people who soon become lifelong friends. Share that kindness and see how it comes back to help you. Not many people can afford support, but the more volunteers we have, the more we can ensure these people are being heard. Volunteering is also a good market for a workplace. So as you can tell, lots and lots of advantages!
Have you learnt any skills that help you in your current job?
Since we were trained to support our mentees, I sometimes apply that training to my work. It also helped me sharpen my ability to ask the right questions, which is important during meetings.